180 days with Jordan

sodium sediments stick

on upper eyelashes.

shuttering and shaking,

while I take what was left.

you are now officially out of my life.

switching and shifting,

on second Sunday of the month.

suffering over sad sentiments,

left over from our February weekend.

There is a reason why Disney character’s mothers always die.

Cinderella, Little Mermaid
Whiff of hot gin
Shouts
I swear, mama, it wasn’t me!

Sleeping beauty, Aladdin
Sunny afternoon
Yelling
What did you do with it?

Beauty and the Beast, Dumbo
Tugs on Barney & Friends T-shirt
Crying
Me never touched it! Never!

Lady and the Tramp, Pocahontas
Expensive empty bottle of perfume
Throwing
Trash my things, I will yours!

Lion King, Peter Pan
Trash can filled with VHS
Finding
Is this the perfume on the bathroom floor?

The bewitching of a young Indiana girl

a brief charm

stabbing so genuinely

touching me like a lady

like I meant something

to you (for an instant)

in your hard wood apartment

with your delivery sushi and hot tea

telling me that you would take care of the parking ticket

but now I comprehend

this was false

the sting of your disloyalty takes me and

moves me.

I asked to come to Chicago

to visit you but you told me you were busy

with work.

Or perhaps another girl.

though I know

I should not be astounded

and that I should not be troubled

it was only a little charm

that you cast on me like words sprinkled on the page to hypnotize

and this spell of your charm

and has been broken

from your cruel embrace of indifference.

Just because you fight for our country doesn’t mean you can be an asshole.

Thank you.
Planes fly
Back to places where people belong
Left from the place that loved you
small town Indiana
No,
Notes; phone call
None of the above
American to Qatar
Brain mashed like your tiny bag of nuts
Drink? She asks
Yes, you’ll take one
but I’ve been drinking since you left
The heaviest stuff possible.
the plane lifts off

Puerto Vallarta

it burns
looking over to the hard rocks
waves endlessly crashed on
bitter water slamming
all over

it aches
wanting you to emerge, to show
from those rocks to hurry
the rough surface, hot sand
to make love

it stung
the hot sand lay under my hands
beads scratching the soft parts
while I waited and looked
and waited

it stays
my imprint is still on the beach
looking and still waiting
for you to come over
to take me

Pine Trees

Lines of pines trees
No,
Rows of pine trees

Prickling pines penetrate
Force
My skin when pressed

Asphalt meets the line
Where
Friendship and brutality meet

Twigs break
Along
With spirit and body

The pines stay quiet
As
Does the girl that meets them

Dance Class

her body bends beautifully
gracious movement
pupils full of curious life
breasts breath-taking
pure lust – wanting her every stretch

A Chicago Affair

a Lakeshore Drive
luminous Red Sign
Congress
Remembering that
Dark night in a Dark dress
elevator dropping with my stomach
receiving that Kiss
That changed my mind

spermicidal bathwater

i’m lying conscious in this chilly
bathtub filled with my icy limbs.
breaths grow to be deeper while my
fingers grab for some sort of warmth.
i hear your love sounds scream across the apartment.


there’s this throbbing pour of
frostbitten water cold.
a shivering sting that
vibrates through me.
a lonesome bathtub you have given to me.


children should not be given such
a bitter bath.
hidden away inside a ceramic coffin waiting
for you to finish
scattering your seed.

Broken Engagement

Pain behind pain
Stiff beyond stiff
Contradiction between contradiction
Speak now or forever.

Numb Limbs

hands thrusting over blushing flesh moving toward
finely tuned areas that pulse toward the aching hands
rushing to take all off but a
button unable to dislodge from its denim puncture
shuttering and ripping the fabric into threads and fibers moving to
uncovered breasts panting – begging to be seized when suddenly
blood is dashing to both their centers- swelling genitals to the point where
bodies slam into one another- one inside the other- one on top of the other-
moaning, screaming, gasping, grabbing, tossing and then
Bliss.

Love HAS Got to do with it

A quick glance can only show
So much from a young girl
to another girl suspecting
that she maybe
would be someone to get close
to and perhaps make love.

I always thought of love
and different ways to show
this kind of feeling, to be close
with a particular girl
and that maybe
she too is suspecting

this kind of new suspecting
of female-only love
that it could work maybe
and let it show
to all the world, especially to this girl.
My mind feels so close

to this wanted reality that is about to close.
People are cruel and suspecting
of my affection for another girl
whom I want to love-
I am afraid to show
my true self, maybe

No, I should forget them, maybe
forget those who are close
to me and who show
me care without suspecting
any ill will and love
but hate for me to show the same to a girl.

I have decided that I am a girl
and am now feeling that maybe
I am in love
with a girl who is a close
friend, and I am suspecting
that our love will show.

Family is suspecting my love for a girl,
a girl that I am a close friend with and maybe
one day I could show my affection for.

Miss Sales Representative speaks to Soon ex-lover

RUN OF PRESS!
RUN OF PRESS!
Running, running
Wishing or wanting to
RUN

What do you mean RUN OF PRESS?
It means anywhere else
In the paper – but classified.

What about Classified?
I want it in classified!
I get the feeling you do too.

I need to run,
As soon as possible.
Is today the deadline?

It is the deadline for
RUN OF PRESS
ROP or Classified.

The Advertising Coordinator
cannot wait any longer.
Give me all your ad material.

I need to give you this important
Information
And run.

So,
Please give me a column inch

My Last Love Letter to My Former Lover

Dear Chicago,

Your damp windy nights have left me with a notion to write you a letter.

The sound of the L train used to horrify me as it cried by on its high rise of steel poles and bars. It looked as though it was chasing something
that it could never catch.
Something perhaps I should have been on and maybe
I would be moving toward the outside of this little shitty living space in this loop.
Instead I am waiting in this drafty apartment
that is sitting atop endless rows of stairs.

Your tower literally tilted and swayed my head
like the mighty black blocks balanced on top of one another that stood in front of me. With its reputation raised expectations,
along with my body in its elevator.
The feeling of being at the peak of the city stayed with me
from then till a decade later.

The dirty streets are lined with both people
of profession and those having no home.
Surrounding people either speaking to me, glaring or ignoring
all make me feel appreciated.
The air is loaded with dense pollution,
tension which makes me ache and addicted.

Lets meet tonight,
as soon as you can,
to make love under the dim lights of the old historic apartment with all hardwood floors and steel radiators.